mall man

So Sammy and I were hangin' at the mall last week, all sorts of badass. We were like "Yo!" to these fine honeys who were like 14 but were totally going to be hot in like 10 years. Dude, but someone last week was all up in my grill about this. They were like "only chicks and skate punks hang at the mall. What are you, like 15?" Dude, I'm all of 27 and totally built, ie I'm 100% d-u-d-e. No filler, no preservatives, not watered down. All dude.

So what if Sammy and I ran through Filenes (real deal, not that basement bullshit). We were playing perfume tag. He was so it when I sprung from behind the Calvin Klein display armed only with guile and a bottle of Obsession. Man, you should have seen the tears running from his burning eyes. Afterwards, we were all over Pacific Sunwear where we picked up some sweet shirts to show off our youthful angst.

I'm 27. I'm a dude. I live on Sbarros. So? What? You wanna make something of it?

I thought so...